The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]


AMEX Is More Effective Than A Fry Up!
September 28, 2007, 7:00 am
Filed under: Comment

Fried breakfast. Oh God Yum.

This is dedicated to one of my dear friends who recently went with some mates to a lapdancing bar and proceeded to get right-royally pissed.

That in itself isn’t particularly unusual [I mean the pissed bit, he’s normally quite a clean living bloke] however the next morning he woke up feeling – and I quote – “like someone had shat in his head” so he went and ate some food, took some Panadol and had a shower in a desperate bid to clean himself up. However this was the mother of ALL hangovers which is why 3 hours later, he found himself still feeling like death and looking like some sort of roadkill!

Anyway, because he couldn’t remember where he’d been or what he’d done, he decided to call AMEX to find out just how much he’d spent.

Neon poledancer

After the nice lady on the other end of the phone read him some numbers [which he initially assumed was his credit card digits], he realised that in about 4 hours, he’d spent the equivalent of Russia’s GDP on a night of sleaze … however on the bright side, his hangover had left him and he felt more alive than he’d ever felt in his life.

The best bit [for me at least] is that he still can’t remember a single thing about the night in question so it’s like he literally poured thousands of dollars down the drain. [or down some strippers pants more like, ha!]

God I absolutely love it when my friends make complete fools of themselves … this is even better than when George fucked up in India [Delhi-Belly] and Cannes [Vomiting on half of Crispin’s]

So there you go, under certain circumstances AMEX can be a more effective anti-hangover cure than all the other ‘medicines’ put together – so if I were them, I’d ditch all this “APPLY FOR A CARD AND GET A WATCH” nonsense and adopt this as their new, all-encompassing strategy.  [What do you reckon Angela, can you make the Yanks buy it?]


3 Comments so far
Leave a comment

For nights you’ll never forget, and nights you struggle to remember…

Comment by Rob Mortimer

Don’t go home without it!

Comment by John

I haven’t had a night I can’t remember in some time.
Which is a good thing, last time apparently I was singing Britney Spears at loud as my lungs would allow. Costly in it’s own way.

Comment by np




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