The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]


When Is A Reunion Not A Reunion …
October 21, 2010, 6:26 am
Filed under: Comment

In the last 10 years, we’ve seen a huge number of bands that were once successful in the past, reform to record an album and go on tour.

Whilst some of them are probably doing it for the sheer love of making music, it’s pretty fair to say a lot of them are doing it for the money.

Hey, I don’t blame them – if someone offered me a truckload of cash to play some crappy songs I originally wrote 30 years ago, I’d be dusting off my guitars before you could say “bandwagon”.

But here’s the thing, some of these bands are reforming with such a motley crue of members that it feels more like a Frankenstein version of the band rather than anything to do with the original line up.

OK, so when a member has died, it makes it a bit hard to get all the guys together [ie: Queen] … and the same applies to when one of the band has decided he wants to retire from the limelight and madness [ie: John Deacon of errrrm, Queen] but it amazes me just how many of these groups are getting huge bucks when it consists almost entirely of musicians who have little or nothing to do with the original line up.

Thin Lizzy, for example, seemingly is made up of more members who had nothing to do with the band in their heyday than genuine ‘names’.

Of course this is nothing new – there’s been lots of bands who have chopped and changed members without so much as a blink of the eye – but when you’re riding the nostalgia gravy train, I find it amazing that some bands can get away with it when the ‘iconic members’ are no where to be seen.

Imagine Led Zep without Plant or Page?

The Who without Daltry or Townsend?

Oasis without the Gallagher’s?

Even the fucking Smiths without Morrissey or Marr?

You can’t can you … well not in any way where you’d think they’d be as good.

The reason I say this is because I’ve just heard that the Faces are reuniting for a gig but instead of Rod Stewart, they’re getting MICK FUCKING HUCKNALL!!!

Yes, the ginger Manc of ‘Simply Red’ fame.



[No, it’s not Kim Jong Ill or even a fat William Hauge, it’s Mick Hucknall]

I know they’ve both sold a shitload of records and shagged ladies that are well out of their league but even with Rod’s recent foray into American Songbook blandom, he is still miles above the bloke who gave the World ‘Holding Back The Years’ and ‘Stars’.

I know there’ll be a good proportion of you who won’t even know who the Faces are, but trust me, Hucknall replacing Stewart is the equivalent of John Goodman replacing Tom Cruise in Top Gun.

The fact the concerts will no doubt sell out offends me to the core, not to mention puts my faith in humanity in serious jeopardy.

Now I am sure some of you are thinking this is a situation that is similar to brands like Virgin or Apple etc.

Let’s face it, those brands are so synonymous with their founders, that the thought of them existing without them around is hard to comprehend.

Except I don’t think it is.

You see whilst those guys have a huge influence in how their brand operates and develops, their thought process, focus and company growth means there are many other voices and factors that get taken into account when decisions are made whereas in the main, a band survives and thrives on the dynamics of the members within that group [+ their manager] and so when one is removed, it’s much harder to ‘capture the magic’ that made them work in comparison to companies who have had time to nurture and train people to take over when the time is right.

Of course people like Branson and Jobs are going to be as difficult/impossible to replace as someone like Mercury or Lennon, however I would argue that due to their companies size, diversity and development, their loss would have less impact on the brands day-to-day operation than when a pivotal member of a band leaves or is replaced.

Please note I’m not saying losing a Branson or a Jobs won’t have an impact on their respective companies – you just have to see what happened to Apple went when they got rid of Jobs the first time around – however compared to a band, I believe it would be less disastrous because they have a wider net of people and systems in place to minimise damage whereas with a band, with the exception of say their manager, what you see tends to be all you have to play with.


35 Comments so far
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campbell, i dont do this very often but that is grade a character killing and if any fucker deserves it, its that curly mop ginger manc bastard hucknall.

how he fucked catherine zeta jones is anyones guess. oh no it isnt, shes a conniving fame whore and would fuck a pensioner if she thought itd get her on tv. hello mr douglas.

dont really give a fuck about the rest of the post or the planning bollocks youre spouting but for calling that hucknall twat the bastard love child of a north korean dictator and a jumped up hamster looking british mp twat, you get a round of fucking applause and we know that comes around less than hayleys fucking comet.

i remember when this petty viscousness was your calling card, not the mild shit you spout these days but if you carry on where this post leaves off, all will be forgiven, even being a planner.

oh who the fuck am i kidding, like jill says to you each night, theres no fucking way you can keep it up.

limp dick fucktard.

Comment by andy@cynic

When I get sacked from W+K, I might use this comment from ‘the man who doesn’t “do” compliments’ as a reference for a future job. Let’s face it, even calling me a petty viscous something-or-other is better than the others I’ve got, especially Rupert Howell’s one …

Comment by Rob

that photo of faux queen at the top of the post is evidence those fuckers are ill and need to be put in a room with padded walls and an attendant who comes in every few hours to beat them with a stick.

though brian may needs to be attacked by a hairdresser. poodlepermtwat.

just an observation campbell, dont start fucking crying.

Comment by andy@cynic

Roof on?

Comment by Billy Whizz

the fuckers take 400 tea breaks afuckingday, what the fuck do you think.

Comment by andy@cynic

Is that a no?

Comment by Billy Whizz

a couple of million sperm and yours was the only one to make it. fucking unbelievable.

Comment by andy@cynic

My greatest achievement.

Comment by Billy Whizz

Lemmy will be replacing Michael in the Jackson 5 next. Or is it now called the Jackson 4?

Comment by Billy Whizz

nice kicking them when theyre down billy, fucking nice indeed.

wonder what the rest of campbells post is going on about? who the fuck cares, today is anti fucking hucknall decade.

Comment by andy@cynic

as much i love your planning posts most of the time, i have to agree with andy here – ripping into faces/huck/queen/etc would have sufficed.

such finely crafted vitriol shouldn’t be tainted. it’s like having espresso coffee with milk.

btw, you’re lucky i’m up late reading this otherwise you’d have properly spoilt my breakfast with that hr puff’n’stuff photo of poor mick. now, i’ll just have nightmares instead.

having said that, i’m not sure that a sliced/diced/botoxed image of the rod himself would be much better.

goodnight.

Comment by lauren

see campbell, even queen fucking lauren agrees with me. drop the planning shit and get back to being an evil, vindictive bastard.

cant fucking stand rod stewarts music but hes banged some top totty over the years and so he deserves my respect. i know hucknall will claim to have done the same but he a manc ginger and that changes everyfuckingthing.

Comment by andy@cynic

i have never fucked anyone from queen. or a member of a monarchy. just to make that clear.

Comment by lauren

not for lack of fucking trying i bet.

Comment by andy@cynic

bitch

Comment by lauren

So if this planning thing doesn’t work out for me, I guess you’re all saying I have a chance at becoming adlands Perez Hilton.

That’s even more depressing than waking up and finding I’m a multi millionaire singer whose shagged loads of babes even though I have ginger hair and am called Mick Hucknall.

Seriously, you guys make me feel like Michaelangelo after painting the Sistine Chapel and being told, “We’d of been happy if you’d just slapped on a coat of magnolia”.

[Maybe Michaelangelo is a bit of an overstatement there … Maybe …]

Comment by Rob

yeah campbell, when i think of you i immediately think of one of histories greatest creative minds and wonder if youre him reincarnated. twat.

and dont worry campbell, you will never be perez twatdom, he actually has to do some work each day to get his vast fucking salary.

Comment by andy@cynic

That actually is a relief.

Comment by Rob

how fucking convenient. .

Comment by andy@cynic

So it’s a no no to repeat my whole Sir Richard-is-à-liability-to-the-brand-by acuallly-staying-around spiel?

to bad.. would of pointed to how lame and pathetic his recent cameo on Entourage was, where hè pretented to be single and banging 2 chicks that couldd of been his daughters in order to still look relevant to americans went against everything the brand stands for and almost made him look like Mick H, almost obviously with all due respect.. but i guess i won’t… So Lee please call of the hitsquad.

though i Will point out that Bill Gates could pull off a sinatra, and be better than the he

Comment by Niko

Everyone makes mistakes Niko. Even Mr B.

And I won’t get in trouble for saying this because that happened when he read the paper I wrote for him 3 years ago about this very subject.

Comment by Rob

Fucking cock shit iPod touch screen…i know the meek, china, will rule the world but untill then… make à touchscreen fit for drunk grown up people Bazza..

“be better than before hè retired.. “

Comment by Niko

OMG. He does look like Kim Jong-il.

Comment by Leigh

By the looks of it, he’s about as liked as him too.

Comment by Rob

so kim jong il is into wigs and dressing up. who would have thought.

companies like apple or conglomorates like virgin are more than their founders. yes. but. im pretty sure the stock price would dramatically tank when jobs would leave apple today. apple is jobs, jobs is apple. i think in apples case the personality cult is worse than virgins, actually… anyway, those types of companies need a bloody pr campaign for a long time in advance to persuade the public and stakeholders when there are leadership changes i guess… that it will all be same same but different… vision etc… im bored. i just listened to the faces.

Comment by peggy

I agree with you Peggy, infact I said that in the post however while their share price would fall [let’s face it, it’d fall if they had constipation] the point is that they wouldn’t implode because despite the figureheads, they are organised in a way to share action and responsibilities whereas in a group, quite often all you have is what is in front of you.

Comment by Rob

It makes me glad I never listened to all that stuff, let alone idolised any of them…I’m wondering what will become of Bieber in a few years to come. This is why I prefer drum and bass: no one even knows the real artist name, let alone cares who they sleep with! Do we know the sexual history of Kraftwerk? Do we care? 😀

If Jobs leaves Ive in control of everything, everyone can breathe a sigh of relief.

Comment by andreea

I thought they were all in love with computers…?

Comment by Rob Mortimer

Well, computers aside…there’s hardly the same enthusiasm for who shags whom in music nowadays. Firstly it’s much easier to get in touch with bands and artists if you think about it.

Hell, calling something “mainstream” now could mean something different from one channel to another. Do I care that Justin Bieber is mainstream to 10-14-year old teenage girls? No, but they’re the only ones who still care whom he’s snogging in the back seat of a car.

Reality sinks in…to be honest I’m glad we’re no longer in that time where the only universe you could pick partners from was your neighbourhood (read street), school (college/uni) or work. Open facebook. Stalk. The world is infinite and marvellous. Bands? Who needs bands anymore?

Comment by andreea

advocating stalking? you might be the worlds ultimate fucking woman. changing track, if the alternative is that prepubescent haircut bieber, ill tell you who needs bands. everyfucker. .

Comment by andy@cynic

The world needs artists. If they are bands then fine, but just more accesible.

I love going to a gig, sending a message to a band and getting a real reply. 10 years ago that took effort and a long wait. (I once got a signed cd cover that took the best part of 4 years to arrive!)

Comment by Rob Mortimer

If it keeps Hucknall away from simply red then I’m all in favour.

I think the key is keeping the attitude and personality. I can believe that Virgin will survive because Branson has such a strong style that it must surely influence the way those around him work.

Comment by Rob Mortimer

fuck me andreea youre right. that means i can tell birds i play in kraftwork and lve the groupie groping dream. now that is fucking the sort of shit i want from a planner.

and the day branson dies will be fucking tragic. my hotline to the free life will be fucking over. plus auntie fucking george wont have anyone left to name drop.

Comment by andy@cynic

Thanks to Don Draper, we’re told manliness is coming back. You don’t need to tell birds you are Andy of Leopard Skin Treehouse fame, you can just wear a suit and hold a drink in your hand, stare with intent and voila!

Comment by andreea

not the sort of birds i like, but i get your point which is more than i do with every other fucker.

Comment by andy@cynic




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