Filed under: Comment
So when I was driving up to Nottingham – from Heathrow Airport – to see my Mum a few weeks ago, I stopped off at a service station for a coffee and toilet break [not in that order].
While there, I saw a product dispenser that seemed to really understand the needs of the average British male.
Let me rephrase that.
While there, I saw a product dispenser that seemed to specifically cater for the sexual needs of the average British male.
OK, so it didn’t offer you the ability to obtain a nubile, young female to entertain you … but it did sell condoms so you could practice safe sex as well as headache pills so she wouldn’t have an excuse for not having safe sex with you.
Obviously designed by a man who has suffered great frustration in the ‘sealing the deal’ stakes.
In fact, if the machine also offered a ‘how to’ guide on personal grooming and developing a personality, I think it would have pretty much every possibility covered … except for the slightly annoying fact that buying condoms from a service station on the M1 is possibly one of the least erotic things you can do.
Unless you’re from Derby, because those freaks would fuck a hole in the floor.
Or the back of a sheep.
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