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There’s a couple of people I know who are struggling with some major decisions in their life.
Some of them are almost paralysed by it … knowing they should act but fearing what might happen if they do.
All this is leading to is doubt, uncertainty stagnation and regret.
Of course big decisions need big considerations, but too often we end up focusing on what we might lose rather than also considering what we might gain.
I get it. I really do.
When I was deciding on whether to move to Australia, I was utterly conflicted.
A lot of things were going on in my life at that time so the easier option was definitely to stay in England.
And yet my heart – and my parents – felt it was something I should do.
I was so stressed out by the decision that, much to my parents amazement, I went to see a councellor.
In over an hour of conversation, there was one thing he said that especially helped.
While he acknowledged moving to Australia was a risk – especially for the reasons I was going to do it – he said the thing I had to remember was the greater the risk the greater the potential reward.
Of course that’s obvious and of course, that also highlighted how in my particular case, there was a relatively low potential for success … but in my quest to work out what to do, I’d lost sight of the possibilities that could occur if it all went well and that bit of clarity helped me make my decision.
For me, that decision was to move 12,000 miles away from my beloved family and see what might happen.
And what happened?
Well, based on the original reasons I went … it failed.
It didn’t fail immediately and I had an amazing journey along the way but based on the final outcome, it failed.
However for a billion different reasons, it changed my life for the better forever.
I cannot begin to cover all the amazing things I have experienced and discovered in my life because I took that first step.
To be quite honest, everything that has happened to me in the last 18 years can be traced back to that decision to go.
Every single thing.
The life I now enjoy would never – and I am not overestimating that – have happened had I let my mind only focus on the risk rather than the potential for reward.
That doesn’t mean my life would have been bad had I stayed in England, but it would certainly be very different and so I am forever grateful to my parents, friends and councillor who helped me make a balanced decision rather than a fear driven one.
So to the people I mentioned at the beginning of this post who are going through their own moment of indecision, I leave you a little poem.
It was given to me by a friend who was given it by their friend.
After 17 years of marriage their husband died.
He was 39.
She was on her own with a young child.
She didn’t know what to do but she knew she had to do something.
It helped her. I hope it helps you.
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