I can’t believe it’s been 3 months today Mum.
It seems impossible.
But that’s probably because I still can’t quite believe you’ve gone.
The amount of times I want to pick up the phone.
Send you an email.
Get on Skype.
As I wrote here, I feel being in China is in some way isolating me from the full pain of your loss.
I know you wouldn’t want me to hurt, but I don’t know if that is a good thing or not.
To imagine the way I am today, just 90 days ago, would be unfathomable.
On March 9th my World felt like it had literally fallen apart and yet now, 3 months later, things are ‘back to normal’.
Well, not ‘normal’, but the illusion of it.
Of course part of my ability to get on with things is due to little Otis.
He’s a lifesaver in more ways than one.
I wish you could see him.
He’s growing so big and developing so much.
He’s such a happy little chap … greeting us with a massive smile every morning.
To see someone develop literally in front of your eyes is an amazing thing. I know you saw it with me, but I wish you could see it with him.
Maybe you can.
I’ll hold on to that thought.
I miss you Mum.