The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]


Among The Bullshit, There Are Nuggets …

OK, I openly admit that is the worst post title ever.

But hang in there.

The reason I said it is because – let’s be honest – our industry can talk a lot of shite.

Not only that, we can – and often do – spend an inordinate amount of time ‘discussing’ stuff that should be pretty simple and obvious to solve/decide.

I have a friend who found himself spending 2 years of his life – TWO YEARS – sitting in various meeting rooms around the World, listening to his clients discuss whether the word “refreshing” should be included in their brand onion.

For a water brand.

No, seriously.

Even after doing this job for almost 30 years, I still haven’t been able to work out if the mind-numbingly relentless monotone of discussion is due to internal politics or individuals who realise that stopping decisions actually generates greater revenue.

However, while the way many go about this stuff can be rightfully ridiculed, the reality is the issues being discussed are often important – at least from a brand perspective – which is why the next time someone say’s brand hierarchy is a load of bollocks, show them this …

Just make sure you then don’t spend 2 years discussing what the right bloody answer is.

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18 Comments so far
Leave a comment

Brilliant. I will steal this Robert.

Comment by George

What’s even more brilliant is this happened this year. Rob is entering an new phase of topical not topical blog posts.

Comment by DH

it must be some sort of accident.

Comment by andy@cynic

Definitely an accident. It won’t happen again.

Comment by Rob

Why would you be a friend with someone who is willing to waste 2 years of their life on a brand onion? Whatever that is.

Comment by DH

brand onions are like the sex registry. designed to let others know youre a fucking wanker.

Comment by andy@cynic

Brand onions are a bit like comms planners … a terminology and pseudo expertise designed to create profitable disciplines from things that we already did perfectly well before they existed.

And as for why would I be friends with them? Beggars can’t be choosers Dave.

Comment by Rob

More like you think he’s your friend but he doesn’t think you’re his.

Comment by DH

Isn’t that communication design?

Comment by John

Design that shows that emphasising the brand hierarchy is a bad idea.

Comment by John

But I’m probably missing the point as usual.

Comment by John

what the fuck are you on about?

and its none of this shit its common fucking sense. focus on what the fuck you need someone to focus on. thats it. and if theres a hierarchy, 99% of the time its because youre an egotistical fuck.

Comment by andy@cynic

That’s what i meant to say.

Comment by John

The cult of design thinking.

Comment by Pete

Funny, I was with someone yesterday talking about design thinking. And you’re right, it’s achieved cult status … and while it is definitely valuable and useful, it has taken on almost mystical powers, where some assume it can solve everything when at its heart, it’s simply understanding your audience and understanding how they operate/think in certain situations.

Comment by Rob

You certainly know how to have a wild weekend.

Comment by John

So what will you tell the next client who asks you to “make the logo bigger”?

(I once had this request from a small Scotsman, who said: “Can we no make it a big bigger? It’s a wee bit discreet, don’t you think? Like a vicar’s fart!”)

Comment by Ian Gee

You’re turning into John Dodds very quickly Ian. Haha.

Comment by Rob




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