The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]


Why Linkedin’s Secret Sauce Will Leave A Totally Horrible Taste In Your Mouth …

I’ve written a lot about Linkedin in the past.

None of it, let’s face it, that complimentary.

Part of that is because of what some users view as professional and part of that is because they show a total lack of understanding of who their users are … but it also doesn’t help its become a place where bullshit head hunters blindly contact you about bullshit jobs.

Or worse, where they ask you for names of people they can then bombard with their bullshit jobs.

Continuing the theme of bullshit and Linkedin, have a look at this …

WHAT. THE. FUCK?

Seriously, what are they talking about?

Why are they going on about ‘secret sauce’?

Why are they trying to make it sound that the average schmuck can have the same power and influence over Linkedin as THE PEOPLE WHO OWN LINKEDIN?

And given no one actually knows what they’re talking about, why would anyone care how Linkedin uses Linkedin to market their secret sauce … let alone the fact that given no one knows what their secret sauce is, it must mean Linkedin is absolutely shit for marketing.

I swear to god this is nothing more than a bet some people had in Linkedin to see how many times they could put the word Linkedin into an ad. Because any other reason just doesn’t make the slightest bit of sense.

This is another perfect example of when companies try and act in a way that is totally inauthentic to them. Embrace your boringness Linkedin, because at least it will make me think you’re self aware, whereas now, I just think you’re a bloody idiot.

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21 Comments so far
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Secret sauce? Like coke’s magic formula and KFC’s secret blend of herbs and spices. Basically stuff that’s bad for you that was once popular and isn’t as much anymore? Yep, sounds like linkedin.

Comment by DH

And if your sauce is blue then it won’t be appetizing and won’t be very secret. Linkedin just proved they don’t get it.

Comment by DH

yes. a fucking million times yes.

Comment by andy@cynic

The unsecret, unsauce.

Comment by George

God you’re right. They can’t even do that right.

Comment by Rob

linkedin are like a fucking local radio station. they think theyre hotshit but theyre just a big chunk of cheesy shit.

Comment by andy@cynic

has any fucker ever got anything worth something off linkedin? their greatest fucking achievement is creating the illusion they do something worth having. any twat who has paid them money must be the stupidest and gullible asshole on earth and i have an amazing business deal for them to invest in.

Comment by andy@cynic

To be fair, they are keeping the recruitment industry alive by charging them to be lazy but be able to claim to their clients they are undertaking an ‘exhaustive’ search’ for the right candidate.

Comment by Rob

At least drug dealers give you something that makes you feel good for 20 minutes.

Comment by Billy Whizz

and you dont lose as much of your fucking dignity using it.

Comment by andy@cynic

Carrot Top is the linkedin of comedians.

Comment by Billy Whizz

You’re becoming almost as topical as Rob with that reference.

Comment by DH

Èxcept you’re using it to prove a point where Rob uses it because he thinks it’s relevant and interesting.

Comment by DH

Planners know shit.

Comment by Billy Whizz

I wholeheartedly agree with this post.

Comment by George

Secret source would be better. Still crap, but better.

Comment by John

Let us hope linkedin is better at networking than marketing.

Comment by Lee Hill

I don’t even know if they do that to be honest Lee.

I don’t know what they actually ‘do’. I swear to god the most popular feature will be ‘see who has checked you out’ so you can convince yourself you’re still career relevant or – at worse – to make you feel you have been swiped right when on Tinder, no one swipes in your direction.

Comment by Rob

LinkedIn. For unpopular Tinder users who want to feel they still can make some people interested in them.

Now that is an insight. Or it would be if it was true.

Comment by Pete

But it makes more sense than their secret sauce campaign.

Comment by Pete

I fucking loathe LinkedIn douchebaggery with all my soul.

Comment by Marcus




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