The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]


When Culture Bleeds Into Culture …

You know you lived in Shanghai when you’re driving, see the sign above and think it’s a Chinese street name rather than how American’s roadsigns say ‘pedestrian crossing’.

I wish I was joking, but I’m not.

How I passed my driving test is anybody’s guess.

I’ve got to be honest, while I am really enjoying my time in the US, I am finding it harder to adapt to certain things than I thought I would.

Not just because I feel my frame-of-reference is more Asian based than American, but because there are some things I am being subjected to that I just never encountered before.

To be honest, this is a post for another day – because it’s actually been quite challenging for me – but let me just leave you with this as a ‘teaser’ for next time.

I had just been in a very, VERY boring meeting with someone.

When I got out, I was asked how it had been.

I replied, “I feel I’ve just been brain raped”.

Their mouth almost hit the floor. Literally hit-the-floor.

Trust me, there’s so many more stories like that. I’m amazed I’m still allowed in the country.



Alphabet Genocide …
July 10, 2017, 6:20 am
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, America, Comment, Culture

When you move countries, you miss a bunch of stuff from home.

I wrote about this a while back – but having moved to LA, I have discovered something I miss that I never even considered before.

This:

Yep, it’s the letter u.

For some reason, America seem to have some sort of vendetta towards it and have tried to commit ‘alphabetical genocide’ to wipe it out forever.

Honor
Labor
Savior

Of course I never write it like that [just like I will always spell doughnut, d-o-u-g-h-n-u-t and I will always use an ‘s’, not a ‘z’], but every single time I have used the English way of writing a ‘u’ word with the ‘u’, I get a note saying ‘you know in America we spell it without the u’.

Yes America, I do know that and while I am incredibly grateful for the hospitality and generosity you have shown towards me and my family, I will never spell a word without a ‘u’, I will never a high-five and I most certainly will never call football, soccer.

What’s weird is I was never this much of a dick in China. OK, I was – but not about this sort of thing – which has taught me that nothing makes you more British than living in a country that claims to speak English. I dread to think how I’ll react when Otis starts adopting more Americanisms … or as Andy said, more Californiaisms, which – even US citizens say – is the lowest of the low.



Hello America …
May 23, 2017, 10:32 pm
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, America, China, Comment, Family, Otis

I have good news and bad news.

The good is this post does not signal the full return of this blog.

The bad is I have still written a post.

Before I begin, to everyone who entered the APSOTW … we’re close to having consolidated feedback and it will [hopefully] be posted in a couple of weeks. Huge apologies for the delay, but with the move – and the usual ‘herding sheep’ – it’s taken longer than I would have liked.

As for the move. Well, after an incredibly emotional goodbye we – Jill, Otis, Rosie the cat and myself – got to America unscathed.

I have to say it was weird having Rosie on board with us – hearing her meow – but given how quickly she acclimatised to her new surroundings, it obviously was a much better experience for her than the other times she has flown in the cargo.

We have been here just under a week and while it’s been rather hectic – organising social security numbers and driving tests and looking for places to live, not to mention enduring some rather extreme jetlag – it has been pretty special.

Not just because we got to spend time together exploring our new surroundings, but because we had family visiting America so we got to hang out with them too.

But more than that, everyone has been super nice to us. Everyone.

Strangers, government officials, [soon-to-be-new] colleagues … people have gone out of their way to make us feel welcomed.

Even the immigration officer was nice when we entered the country and that literally has never happened to me before.

There is a little park near us where we have taken Otis on a number of occasions. Every single time, a different family have come up to us and said hello and offered to help with anything we need. Even if they’re just saying it – and I don’t think they are as they gave us their phone numbers – I’ve got to be honest, it’s pretty lovely.

And don’t get me started on how amazing the community-run, hippy, mandarin-speaking, creative-focused pre-school is …

Of course it’s early days so I know I’ll find stuff that drives me fucking insane [like the whole tipping protocol] but when I see the smile on Otis’ face as he runs along the beach, I know that as much as I love – and miss – China, this was the right thing to do for my little family.

So of course, now I am in a new country, I need a new blog header and as you can see from above, Jill has worked her magic again.

Or should I say, worked her imagination.

Though after 6 days in LA, I must admit I have grown to have a bit more respect for Mr Hulk Hogan, because how anyone can have a body like that when every place serves food in quantities that would be too much for an elephant, is anyone’s guess.

I miss you China but I like you LA.