The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]


Marketing To The Religious Right …

Over the years I’ve written about some strange beliefs some strange people have.

For strange people, read overly religious, bigoted individuals.

First there was the gum that claimed to stop you masturbating.

Then there was the soap that made you a virgin again.

Well if that wasn’t weird enough, I recently saw this …

Now that is some headline.

It’s a headline that commands your attention.

It’s a headline that demands you delve deeper.

And when I did, I discovered that – similar to TBWA’s current approach to disruption – I left feeling more repulsed than attracted to the cause or the topic. Have a read of this …

I have read this a few times.

And even now – as I read it again – I come away shaking my head in utter dismay and disarray.

Because while I appreciate the authors beliefs are her beliefs [even though I find them unbelievably condescending, patronizing and judgmental] I also think she is fundamentally wrong because I’m pretty sure the main thing young men look for in young women is a pulse.

I’m not saying that’s right but neither is this sort of blinkered bollocks.

But here’s the thing, as blinkered bollocks as this may be … there’s a bunch of people who not only believe this, but live by it. And our industry needs to acknowledge this reality, because while we can judge all we like in our personal opinions, we have to keep an open and curious mind to what’s going on in our professional lives, because real life is a damn sight more complex, twisted and confusing than the nicely curated versions of what’s going that we like to present to the World.

If great communication is about resonance rather than relevance, then knowing the weird is way more important than knowing the convention.

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Fool Me Once. Shame On Me. Fool Me Twice. Shame On You.
October 11, 2018, 6:15 am
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Attitude & Aptitude, Marketing Fail, Perspective, Planners

Remember last year, the very smart Eaon Pritchard wrote a fantastic book then ruined it by asking me to give a quote for the front cover?

Well he sort-of has come to his senses and gone even more mad at the same time.

You see the book has rightfully received a huge amount of praise. So much so that it’s being reprinted.

Now you’d think this would be the moment Eaon would come to his senses and assign my quote – and any connection I have to him – to the dustbin, never to be seen or heard of again.

Well, his book cover now does include an amazing quote from the brilliant Dave Trott.

And in addition to that, he did acknowledge my quote was too long and more about him than his written brilliance.

But …. but ….

In a moment of insanity, he didn’t ask me to bugger off, he asked me to write a shorter, more concise, and book related quote THAT HE WOULD PUT ON THE COVER.

AGAIN!!!

Is he mad?

I think he is, in fact I’d say he’s stark raving bonkers … which is why if you purchase his brilliant literary prose, you’ll see this before you even turn a page.

Ignore the quote, read the book.

It’s brilliant.

Unlike my quote.

Or me.

Damnit.



Women Are Stronger Than Men …

A few weeks ago, I saw these 2 headlines being shared on social media …

Look at them!

Seriously, the fact women deal with this blatant – and subtle – prejudicial shit every single day and don’t want to kill every man they meet, is proof they’re stronger than any man can be.

I cannot tell you how much I really, really hope sperm stops depression in men as well as women.

Not just because depression is an incredibly debilitating illness, but the headlines and machismo bullshit we’ll see from all the misogynists around us, will be hysterical.

Though in a perfect world, it will be women’s pee that will be discovered as the ultimate ‘cure for all’ … because that would really fuck with them.

I’m so over this bullshit and I know I am not the only one … but as I discovered in my time in America, saying you don’t like something is not the same as doing something about it because we know the misogynists will keep doing their bit.



Welcome To Inauthenticity …

I’ve written about Gary Vee before.

And while I admire his ability to promote himself – and don’t deny his considerable entrepreneurial spirit – I feel he is entering that dangerous area where he’s starting to blindly believe his own voice, without any sense of objectivity.

Now there’s many successful people who are like that, but given he preaches on a platform of self awareness, I find this new chapter of his ego particularly unpleasant to witness.

What has raised my ire?

This …

Yep, he has launched his own range of sneakers.

Sneakers!

What the fuck?

Apart from maybe watching sport or having once ridden a skateboard, what credibility has he got to do that?

I could maybe accept it he had got some fantastic – and credible – people to help create them, but that is never mentioned at all.

Of course not, because even if that is the case, I doubt his ego would allow it.

And maybe that’s why he wants people in marketing and entrepreneurship to support him rather than athletes … despite the fact they’re made to look like the bastard love-child of Adidas and K-Swiss.

That’s right, it’s not enough for Mr Vaynerchuk to create a pair of ‘sneakers’ that’s been influenced/plagarised by one credible sports brand, he wants to double influence/plagarise … which kind of sums him up through and through.

Seriously, anyone who buys a pair of these is basically anti-sport and pro-asshole.



Hanging On To The Past …

I appreciate I am the last person who should be writing a post with a title like this one, but recently – when I was in Hong Kong – I saw this billboard …

Now I get that once upon a time, HK was indeed a gateway to China and … in some categories, like law and, to a degree, international finance, it still has a significant role … but China is not this closed off country anymore, in fact I could argue it’s more commercially minded than HK so it seems this is the worst headline you should use to try and attract clients.

Without doubt there’s a role for advertising in HK airport for people traveling to China – especially Chinese tourists – but it’s not because they don’t have options there, hell they have more options that any other place in the World, it’s that you might help them want your option more than the countless others they’ll have available to them the moment they land.



Social Media Reveals How Stupid You Are By Showing How Stupid You Think People Are …

Now I appreciate I am a social media whore and have posted all sorts of rubbish in the past, but even I would never do something like this …

I honestly don’t know who is the bigger idiot …

Nescafe for thinking this is a good idea.

The agency for coming up with this idea.

The couple – who occupy that unique space of un-influential, influencers – who decided to commemorate their engagement by selling their souls for a few quid and appearing in a social media post for an international coffee brand while pretending [1] it’s totally natural to commemorate your engagement by appearing in a social media post for an international coffee brand and [2] it’s totally believable to have a staged photo of you in bed, despite the fact there was a photographer in the room with you..

Some other questions are:

+ Why are they not looking at each other?

+ Why is he so, so, so brown?

+ Judging by how tensed up his arms are, just how heavy is that cup of coffee?

+ Why is he cradling his cock?

Seriously, this might be the most z-grade version of Hello magazine that ever lived.

Everyone involved in this – and I mean everyone – needs a bloody big smack in the head.



Quality Control At A Glance …

Remember, the more confident the marketer the less messages they demand.